Salespeople missing in harbour

A sailing event went horribly wrong in Sydney Harbor today for a secret group of high performers within the insurance industry.

The gathering was designed to celebrate big bonuses garnered by individuals managing write-downs for significant NATURAL DISASTERS on behalf of Meta-Insurance.

Setting sale from Rushcutters – observers commented on the hour long stocking of the bar and enhanced catering supplied by contractors as the A List boarded and cast-off for drinks early.

Further nautical observation had the high achievers celebrating unimpeded with plenty of crooning and preening until a distress call had a craft along side. Marie and Jon Algarth tried to bring revelers aboard as they witnessed blood spurting out of what was the engine bay accompanied by heavy gurgling as a set of entrails and white pumps spat from below.

Marie in particular re-countered the experience with horror as she explained a tidal wave generated by another craft split the thigh muscle of a boarding high-achiever who then plummeted into the drink. At that moment the celebration boat forced off axis sent further insurance people positioned upon the well varnished exterior straight into the water – with ESKI’S and BBQ’S coming from a height. A number of screams ensued and fellow craft could not get to the vicinity in time. As the piss-laden-punters appeared to vanish beneath the waterline while the Opera House bayed its presence in the background – one man appeared to be clinging to the HULL.

As the organiser rang the authorities it was becoming clear the industry would need to start recruiting on Monday.


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